梦之歌 Dreamsong

作者： Rayla Heide

软皮人打破了我们千次轮转的沉睡。

The softskins broke our slumber of a thousand spins.

很久以来，我一直都在感受着世界上绚烂的运动。虽然我看不见它们，但我知道星星在我头顶爆发然后灭亡。我还能感受到太阳的温暖为黄沙带来生命的潮涌。

For many long ages, I sensed the world’s dizzying movement. Stars exploded and died above me, though I did not see them. I felt the warmth of the sun flood the sand with life.

后来我的心跳减缓，蜷缩在干燥的沙子中温暖我的身体，准备长眠。我以为我在地下的时光将会是孤独的，大地不会回应我的触碰。然而我周围的一切都是同族。我能感觉到他们在沉睡中发出的沙沙声。我聆听着他们静默的低语映入我的脑海，我听到他们的梦之歌描述着世界之外的更多世界。一个没有软皮人的世界，没有恐惧、痛苦、怀疑的世界。一个处于伟大平和之中的世界。

When my heartpulse slowed and I curled in the dry sand to warm my body for longsleep, I thought my time below would be lonely, that the earth would not respond to my touch. But all around me were kin. I sensed them rustling in their slumber. I listened to their silent murmurs reaching for my mind. I heard their dreamsongs of worlds upon worlds. A place without softskins, without fear or pain or doubt. A place of great peace.

在沙子中，我们全都心意相通；我们成为一个共同体进入梦境。这里不止有歌者，而是包括了所有生命；包裹着圆润沙谷的蠕虫，挖掘隧道待产的鼹鼠，甚至还有一窝在黑暗深处过夜的软毛的小蜘蛛。

In the sand, we were all connected; we dreamed as one. Not just the singers, but all living things; the worms curling around smooth rockgrains, the molerats burrowing tunnels to birth their young, even a family of fur-soft spiderlings who rested for a night in the deepdark.

我以为岩石是僵硬的、冰冷的、漠然的。但他们同样也是我们的一部分。石块都是温暖的，我们挖掘得越深，就越接近这个世界的元初之火。每次地底怒火沸腾的时候，我都在唱。它的震颤动摇了沙子，直到我以我自己的怒火作为应和。我们合而为一。我们不分彼此。你的愤怒等同于我的愤怒。我听到了它在雨季的感谢，湿润的水滴浸满了沙子，土地变得肥沃丰润。

I thought the rocks would be immobile, cold, uncaring. But they, too, were part of us. The stones were warm, and the deeper we burrowed, the closer we got to this world’s wombfire. Each time the underground boiled in rage, I was there; its tremors shook the sand until I sang back with my own anger. We are one, we are all. Your anger is as mine. I heard its gratitude in the raintime when wet drops soaked the sand and the earth grew fat and full.

后来软皮人来了，只给大地带来了痛苦。我们的歌声变成了哭喊，我们被撕裂、破坏、打散。软皮人掘出了我的同族，我听到了悲伤之歌。他们将名石水晶从我们体内抽出，偷走，我们只能痛苦尖叫，声音大过地震。无数个夜里，我哀声歌唱，唱到我的心变得空洞寒冷，但它们并没有回来。

When the softskins came, the ground knew only pain. Our songs became cries as we were torn and broken and scattered. I heard the sorrowsong as the softskins unearthed my kin. They tore crystal namestones from our bodies as we screamed, louder than earthshakes, and stole them away. I sang long into the many nights, sang until my heart was empty and cold, but they did not return.

今天，我独自来到上界。今天，干燥的风烧灼我的外皮。我每走一步，沙子都在研磨抗议。我抵抗自自己想要深埋的冲动，进入黑暗深处的冲动。我没有离开，我还是共同体的一部分，不在共同体之外。

Today, I am alone in the aboveplace. Today, the dry wind burns my skin. With every step, the sand grinds against me in protest. I fight my urge to bury myself down, down, to go inside the earth’s deepdark. I am not apart. I am part of the one, not beyond.

远处，我听到痛苦恐惧之歌。音调很虚弱，但我记得这旋律，我唱出了自己的悲歌。一个希望的音符映入我的脑海，清晰而且优美。还差一点，就差一点。

From far away, a song of painfear reaches me. The tone is faint, but I recognize the melody, and I send out a song of my sorrow. A note of hope rings back in my mind, clear and fine. Almost, almost.

另一片星空转到我头顶，又过了一次。永世闪烁的宇宙在向下望着我。我能感受到来自上方的炙热沉重的分量。我应该下去，但我在这里，独自在冷风中。

Another set of stars whirl overhead, and again. The endlessly blinking universe stares down at me. I feel moltenheavy with the weight of above. I should be down, but I am here, alone in the cold air.

我已经在地上度过了三个月亮。一眨眼的时间，一丝毫的存在。一个温暖的低语在地下静默地传播——也在上界传播，我感到了永世的孤独。

I have been above for three moons. A blink of an eye, a sliver of existence. A warming murmur passes silently underground — yet in the aboveplace, I feel the eternity of alone.

前方，我听到了软皮人。他们不会唱歌，他们只会叫嚷。他们的音调是刮擦是碰撞，毫无旋律与谐调。他们用虚假之火烧灼血肉。飘出的脂味污染了空气，臭气让我窒息。他们为什么要这么做？大地那么多，对一切来说都足够。

Ahead, I hear softskins. They do not sing, they shout. Their tones scratch and clash without melody or cohesion. They burn meatflesh over a falsefire. Its fat smokes the air and I choke on the stench. Why would they do such a thing? The ground is plenty, plenty for all.

那个旋律虚弱地召唤着我。还差一点。名石已经很接近了。

The melody calls to me weakly. Almost. The namestone is close.

我必须解释；软皮人不理解。他们的种族只有三个轮回这么年轻；他们才刚刚开始挖掘；他们还没有解开下面的初始。他们会说话，但我并没有听到他们唱歌。他们会学会的。

I must explain; the softskins do not understand. Their race is but three turns young; they have only begun to dig; they have barely uncoiled the beginnings of underneath. They speak, but I have not yet heard them sing. They will learn.

我将冷静大陆之歌映入他们的脑海，这样他们就能感受到我们在沉睡时体验到的伟大之美。我为死去的同族唱歌，这样他们就能知道自己究竟偷走了什么。

I sing in their minds a song of the calmland, so they feel the great beauty that awaits us when we sleep. I sing for my dead kin, so they know what they stole.

软皮人并没有用歌声回应。他们似乎没有听到我的歌，所以我用更大的声音传递给他们的头脑。我歌唱我们的名石，被错误地夺走的名石。请把它们还回来，它们属于我们。你们已经谋杀了整整一簇。请不要连同我们的未来一同夺走。我歌唱乞求之歌。请让我带着那些水晶回到黑暗深处，这样它们就能再次与我们向接。我歌唱着治愈之歌。

The softskins do not sing back. They do not seem to hear me so my voice grows louder in their heads. I sing for our namestones, wrongfully taken. Bring them back, they are ours. You murdered one cluster already. Do not deny our future also. I sing a plea. Let me carry the crystals to the deepdark, so they can bind with us again. I sing to heal this tearing wound.

软皮人依然还在互相叫喊。他们其中一个人放出了一个有节奏的声音…笑声？我突然觉得我体内被空气碾压，所以我开始挖掘。我周围的重量让我心安。

The softskins are still shouting to each other. One of them releases a rhythmic sound… a laugh? I feel as though my body is being crushed by the air, so I burrow. I am comforted by the weight around me.

他们为什么看不到自己造成的破坏？你们没有同情心，你们残忍。你们怎么能这样切断我们？

How can they not see the ruin they’ve caused? You are heartless, you are crude. How could you sever us like this?

我的外壳开始发出愤怒的苍穹白光。我不会让这些软皮人消灭我们。

My husk glows skywhite with rage. I will not let these softskins destroy us.

我冲出沙子，听到他们尖叫。我从地面召唤能量，将力量储存在我的名石中。一个软皮人向我投掷分裂刀刃，击中了我的腿，在我发光的外壳上崩碎。你们只会歌唱死亡。我也同样会唱这首歌。我放出了太阳光芒的能量，尖锐的水晶从地面喷出，刺穿血肉，裂开骨骼。

I hear them scream as I erupt from the sand. I summon energy from the ground and store the power in my namestone. A softskin throws a splinterblade and it hits my leg, shattering on my lucent shell. You sing only death. I, too, can sing this song. I release sunbright energy and sharp crystals burst from the ground, impaling flesh and cracking spines.

虚假之火在他们的慌乱中蔓延。用树枝和兽皮做成的原始建筑开始在黑暗中燃烧，带着软皮人进入火焰，浓烟滚滚，为闪烁的星星送去祭品。软皮人混乱地逃跑，但我的速度更快。我在他们周围环绕，拖出了一个落伍的人，用爪子将他切成两半。我用脚碾碎了另一个软皮人。鲜血染红了沙子。我悲恸地嘶吼，这不是歌声而是哭喊。你们的血不配沾染我，和我们。

The falsefire spreads in their panic. Their crude structures of twig and hide burn through the darkness, carrying softskins into the flames. Smoke rises in an offering to the blinking stars. Softskins run from the chaos, but I am faster. I circle around them and lash out at a straggler, slicing his middle apart with my claw. I crush another underfoot. Lifeblood stains the sand. I roar in grief, not a song but a cry. Your blood is not worthy to touch the one and the all.

我的尾巴左右抽打，我将软皮人击倒再低。我再次召唤太阳光芒，更多的水晶尖刺从沙子中喷薄而出，刺穿血肉。这么说，你们到底还是能听到我的歌声的。

My tail lashes left and right and I knock the softskins down. I summon the sunbright once again, and more crystals spike from the sand to pierce flesh. So you can hear my song, after all...

我和他们一样残忍。我是暴力。我是死亡。

I am crude like them. I am violence. I am death.

现在当我进入梦境，我只能看到暴怒。我不再有资格进入黑暗深处。但我无法停下来。

When I dream I see only rage. I am no longer worthy of the deepdark. But I cannot stop.

只剩下最后一个。这个软皮人颤抖地拿着一个发光的木柄铁器。她想要杀了我。一道虚假的阳光从那个东西里射出，刺穿了我的硬壳，烧灼我的内部。光芒在我水晶的内部反射，让我陷入麻痹。我在剧痛之中举步维艰。我无法移动。我已损坏。我已终结。

Only one remains. The softskin fumbles with a glowing thing of wood and metal. She means to kill me. A false sun blazes from the thing and punctures my hardshell, burning my insides. The light reflects inside my crystal, paralyzing me. I stagger in agonizing pain. I cannot move. I am broken. I am ended.

一首微弱的歌声传入我的脑海。还差一点，就差一点。我们合而为一。

A fading song rings in my mind. Almost, almost. We are one.

她将武器再次对准我，我恐惧地发抖，因为我看到了武器上面捆绑着的苍白名石。她的武器吸收着我们的生命能量。他们正在浪费水晶，给他们可怕的歌提供力量。我感觉自己将要在狂怒和痛苦中爆炸，但相反，我从地面吸收力量。我大喊着甩出尾刺，将软皮人刺穿，她像蠕虫一样扭动着。我抓起武器，用爪子碾碎了它。它碎成了灰，只剩下苍穹白光的名石。

She aims her weapon again and I shake with horror as I see the paling namestone strapped to it. Her weapon drains our life energy. They are wasting crystals to power their terrible song. I feeI I will burst in fury and pain, but instead I pull strength from the ground. I cry out and lash with my sting, impaling the softskin as she writhes like a worm. I grasp the weapon and crush it with a claw. It crumbles to dust, leaving only the skywhite namestone.

我用嘴护着水晶，这里它是安全的。我在这，我们合而为一。

I hold the crystal in my mouth where it will be safe. I am here, we are one.

我卷回尾刺，她倒在地上。不要回来。不要夺走我们的名石。我们不是你们的。我们合而为一。我们只属于黑暗深处。

I curl my stinger and she falls. Do not return. Do not take our namestones. We are not yours. We are all. We belong only to the deepdark.

I leave her alive and she runs. She lives not with my mercy, but because I know she has heard my dreamsong, and she has no choice but to sing.